Sunday, September 1, 2013

Notes from Indiana

I spent a few days in Indiana helping a good friend with what will soon be his new home.  He recently bought the place and we were just taking a few steps toward making it nice and cozy.  Here are a few of the highlights from my grand journey with the great Rudolfo.

-Spending somewhere in the neighborhood of 20 hours in a box truck with Rudy was like combining one of the best history classes ever (topics we covered included early presidents, the Revolution, the Civil War, the Alamo, Custer, and so much more) with the Cannonball Run.

-West Virginia State Trooper interrogation:
Trooper: What are you hauling?
Rudy: Furniture.
Trooper: (suspicious) Furniture?  What kind of furniture?
Rudy: Furniture to put in a house.  Dressers, nightstands, stuff like that.
Trooper: (eyes narrow) Did you make it?
Rudy: Um, . . . no.
We got off with a warning.

-Those who know me well know that I don't dig heights or working with electricity.  So there I was, perched on a ladder, attaching a live wire to Rudy's house.

-A boy from the country operated a chainsaw for the first time.  On a roof.  While sweating bullets because I was standing on a slope.  True story.  Man, I dig heights.

-Touring Summitville with Rudy and Tabby in the convertible.  Top down? Check.  Sunglasses on? Check.  Summitville is so very Haddonfield, Illinois, and it's always growing.  It doubled in size during our little tour.

-Eating various meals with Rudy's in-laws, Tom and Lois Kilgore.  I'm a fan of corn, but fresh corn from Indiana--wow!  Also, sugar cream pie.  Boom!  My response when Lois asked if I would like another slice: "Only a fool would say no to that."  Tom and Lois really made me feel at home, both the company and the food were nothing short of fantastic.  I can't thank them enough for their hospitality.

-Mowing the grass with "Frankenstein", the riding mower Rudy cobbled together from various sources.  I think you could mow bamboo stalks with that beast.

-Bella, the pirate pug.  Awesome pet, and one hell of a road dog.

-Indiana is different, and I'm not just saying that because it's flat.  I'm not going to throw rocks at my hometown, but I was amazed that there was no litter anywhere along the road.  The yards were freshly mowed, and there was no debris anywhere.  It was so quaint and it reeked of pride, which are good things, yet it almost felt like an episode of The Twilight Zone at times.  The reason why is simple enough: the grass police are on it.  Seriously, you might be unloading a box truck and trying to get some furniture in your new house when you get your first warning. 

All things considered, it was a neat trip.  Good people of Indiana, you're doing a fine job, but stay on top of the grass situation or you'll be next.

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