Oh shit, son! You have just entered another dimension, a dimension not only of text and pictures, but of madness. You have embarked on a journey into a lunatic's mind. Check your sanity at the door--you're in the Land of Way!
Friday, May 1, 2015
Short Attention Span Review: No One Lives (2012)
No One Lives is far from perfect. There are plot holes, some of the acting is rather questionable, the editing is uneven in places, and there's a bit of confusion here and there as to the overall tone of the picture. Is it a cheesy thrill ride with no soul or a legitimate horror film exploring some dark themes? There are times when gifted director Ryûhei Kitamura (Versus, Godzilla: Final Wars, The Midnight Meat Train) doesn't seem to know for sure, but viewers will quickly realize that this one is a campy frightfest that shouldn't be taken too seriously. As such, it mostly succeeds in spite of its flaws. How does it manage to do that? Well, the movie's biggest strength is surely Luke Evans as the dude who should not have been fucked with, a cool and calculated killer who gets all of the flick's best lines. I'm really starting to like this cat and even if No One Lives is a B-rate horror movie, this could be the best part that he has been given. Of course, he has also played Zeus and Dracula (Dracula Untold), so it's not like Hollywood is giving him the shaft. Anyway, in this movie a gang of redneck crooks make the mistake of messing with the smooth and inventive villain played by Evans, thereby turning a demented murderer into the hero of a wild and exciting feature. Sick and mean-spirited, No One Lives isn't for everyone, but gorehounds and those with a dark sense of humor won't be disappointed. Evans dispatches his foes with style and this bizarro slasher movie cranks out some wildly creative kills. The picture is dripping with blood and the effects are surprisingly solid. No One Lives rockets along, seldom pausing for anything other than a ghoulish joke, a jolt of action, or a wicked death scene. It isn't a great movie, but the right type of person will have a great time with this gruesome oddity.