Short Attention Span Review - Alita: Battle Angel (2019)

Short Attention Span Review - Alita: Battle Angel (2019)

Alita: Battle Angel is a quirky thrill ride, an energetic B movie with A-List special effects and delusions of grandeur.  When it focuses on those amazing effects or the equally dope action bits, it delivers the goods in a big way.  When it plays up the intrigue and the suspense of the premise, it fares almost as well.  However, for the most part, attempts to tug at our heartstrings either fall flat or prove outright cringeworthy.  It also suffers a bit because it is clearly intended to kickstart a franchise that appears unlikely to develop--and as such, it feels incomplete.  Oh, but those effects are something to behold, and Robert Rodriguez really slays it with each and every action sequence.  Every fight is an event, and there are some wild ideas in play where weapons and choreography are concerned.  The creativity is off the charts, and in terms of spectacle, Alita: Battle Angel is a film that goes big often, and comes up aces every time.  And to be fair, the actors show up to play, with Christolph Waltz and Jennifer Connelly bringing considerable gravity to the movie, while Mahershala Ali is more than competent in a part that really isn't worthy of his presence.  Star Rosa Salazar is pretty much perfect in a lead role that demands an awful lot, and there is a solid supporting cast to round things out.  It's all put together remarkably well; the emotional hiccups largely stem from a script that aims to cover too much ground and yet isn't allowed to come full circle as a matter of structure.  It's this combinition of feeling rushed at times and ultimately unfinished that handicaps the experience.  Still, for most of its runtime, Alita: Battle Angel is a delightful display of startling imagination and audacious carnage.

Final Grade: B

Alita: Battle Angel is a rip-roaring B movie that aims to do more, resulting in a rip-roaring  B movie with a few emotional hang-ups.

Short Attention Span Review - Forbidden World (1982)

Short Attention Span Review - Forbidden World (1982)

I should have known better.  I really should have.  But the cover was so pulpy and colorful, and the packaging seemed to promise a good time at the movies courtesy of a cheeky horror flick.  And so I journeyed to Forbidden World.  I did not enjoy my stay there.  Look, I enjoy some low-budget affairs (heck, I consider myself a John "Bud" Cardos fan), but this film looked cheap, sounded cheap, and felt cheap.  It was a ripoff, but that doesn't necessarily doom a film in my book.  It was also more of a softcore extravaganza than a horror film or a science fiction film.  And you know what?  June Chadwick is very easy on the eyes.  But is there any such thing as a good softcore movie?  And, so help me, watching poor June and her equally enticing co-star Dawn Dunlap throw themselves at star Jesse Vint (no offense, but dude is a far cry from anything resembling a stud-muffin) proved harder to digest than the hokey effects.  So, you know, I'm sure some of the people involved tried.  Maybe they tried really hard.  But that doesn't change the fact that Forbidden World is a tacky clone based on a flimsy script, featuring some bad acting (this doesn't include dear June Chadwick going wild for Jesse Vint, which was frankly Oscar-worthy stuff), cheap sets, lousy effects, and even recycled footage.  The only thing this movie has going for it would be those hot chicks throwing down with some slightly below-average Joe with a laser pistol, and a heavy dose of gore.  And I kinda liked the score.  For some, that may be enough, but I thought it was trash.  Anyone out there looking to score a copy of Forbidden World on Blu-Ray?

Final Grade: D-

Okay, June Chadwick is sensational to look at, no doubt it, but that's just not enough to make a trip to this Forbidden World worthwhile.