Short Attention Span Review - The Kindred (1987)

Short Attention Span Review - The Kindred (1987)

I plucked one from the archives today.  The Kindred is a late 80s monster movie that I may have rented a few too many times during my unruly youth.  It is rather gooey, and while I can't rightfully say that it is very good, it is a fun little monster movie.  Like many such affairs that go big often, it lands a few solid punches when it isn't getting knocked on its slimy ass.  Translation: there are some bits that work well and some gnarly effects, and there are also some sequences that fall flat and some effects that miss the mark.  By a lot.  The cast is game, with a young Amanda Pays standing out here and there while Rod Steiger slums it up.  To his credit, while many performers of his caliber would shift into neutral while slumming, Steiger actually seems pretty into it.  And the poor boy does take his lumps in the closing reel, so that is rather commendable.  Our lead (David Allen Brooks as John Hollins) doesn't exactly light up the screen, but he doesn't fall flat either.  Peter Frechette seems a little fierier in a lesser role, and this may be why he suddenly rises to the forefront in the closing reel.  The atmosphere is nice and sinister, the premise is just kooky enough to keep us involved, and an average monster movie is always better than even the greatest love stories captured on film.  That's how I see the world, anyhow.  So, yeah, this is just an average monster movie, nothing more, nothing less, but it was nice to take a stroll down memory lane.  Yes, good people of the internet, I enjoyed revisiting these crazy kids and their grotesque vaguely humanoid siblings.  And if you dig creature features too, you could do far worse.

Final Grade: C

The Kindred is a gooey mess, but it's a lot more entertaining than Gone with the Wind or Titanic.  True story.

Short Attention Span Review: Dark Was the Night (2014)

Short Attention Span Review: Dark Was the Night (2014)

Here's a little picture that slipped through the cracks for the most part and didn't seem to garner a lot of praise.  Mostly regarded as average, I was intrigued by the title and premise, but I honestly didn't expect much from Dark Was the Night.  However, it didn't take long for me to become enthralled, and I found this to be a rock solid creature feature.  I really enjoyed the old school monster movie approach with a plot that fit the "slow boil" mold to perfection and direction that yielded only a few glimpses of the creature until the rousing conclusion.  Kevin Durand and Lukas Haas put in quality work as the leads, and each character came equipped with a backstory that made them easy to root for.  I liked the way the town of Maiden Woods was depicted, and a typical assortment of stock characters made me feel right at home in no time.  Director Jack Heller did a great job of establishing suspense and creating an atmosphere of dread while fleshing out his characters, and he engineered a few big scares along the way to give this one some bite.  Some might be annoyed at the bluish tint that settles over most of the proceedings, but I thought it gave the picture a unique look and it paired nicely with some of the emotional battles playing out in the lives of our protagonists.  Finally, the big finale didn't let me down, and while the effects weren't exactly top-shelf material, they didn't miss the mark by much.  When the town of Maiden Woods gathered together to make their last stand, I found the confrontation that played out to be thrilling and satisfying, and the ending was a perfect throwback to the creature features of my youth.  Yes, those who have a similar nostalgia for the monster movies of the 70s and 80s may find more to enjoy here than modern audiences, but Dark Was the Night is a well-made horror flick that should entertain genre fans of any era.  Is it a B movie?  Absolutely, but it's a damn good B movie, and I would personally welcome a sequel with open arms.

Final Grade: B

I loved the old school creature feature feel, and Kevin Durand and Lukas Haas made for a pair of likable leads.

Short Attention Span Review: The Boogens (1981)

Short Attention Span Review: The Boogens (1981)

Warning: I'm giving to give The Boogens a much better grade than it truly deserves.  I'm going to do this because I was entirely too young when I first saw it and it had quite an impact on my impressionable young mind.  In my defense, Stephen King is apparently a big fan of the picture as well, so cheesy rubber monster effects aside, it can't be all that bad.  The Boogens is a creative and well-plotted horror film that generates a great many chills and thrills, particularly in the first two acts.  That's because early on the filmmakers go to great lengths to avoid showing the monsters, and the eerie scenes and jarring moments that they produce toward that end are far more riveting than the big finale that puts the creatures on clear display.  Now, to be fair, the effects in The Boogens aren't terrible.  This isn't Wes Craven's Swamp Thing, after all.  The blood and the various wounds that present themselves are handled well and the monsters benefit from a wild design even if their overall execution is a bit lackluster.  So, the special effects aren't all that special--it's okay, there are a few worthwhile horror films that suffer from that disease and The Boogens still has a lot going for it.  I think James L. Conway did a fantastic job with the direction and the score by Bob Summers is a real winner.  The opening titles sequence is a bit of a minor masterpiece so far as opening titles sequences for obscure horror films go, and I like the cast.  The pace is nice, the atmosphere is tight, and no one would accuse this one of being boring.  The Boogens is a fun picture from my youth that boasts a few good scares.  Honestly, I treasure this movie, and it has to be noted that encountering tales such as this at such an early age surely played a major role in my lifelong fascination with things that go bump in the dark.  If you're looking for a classic monster flick, opt for John Carpenter's The Thing, which sits atop that mountain.  However, if you're in the mood for something fun and kooky, something that will make you jump once or twice and chuckle a lot, heed my advice and hang out with The Boogens.

Final Grade: B

True Story: I'm not sure how old I was when I first watched The Boogens,
but I certainly wasn't old enough for this type of material.   This particular
scene gave me a profound fear of being yanked beneath a vehicle
and devoured by a rubber monster.